SUPER FUN KID FROM SOUTH JERSEY

(LIVING FOR THE WEEKEND NEWS  Atlantic City, NJ) —  So I have an obsession with The Saturdays, it all started in 2008 innocently watching their second single of their career “Up” in my high school english class. Fast forward to 18 singles,1 UK #1, 3 babies, meeting ME, and 7 years of albums later these girls had given me LIFE and accomplished a decent amount of UK Pop worthy milestones. Even though old management fucked up their second album and wiped them from existence, Flo Rida single handedly  resuscitated them by giving them a call out of “Frankie, Mollie, Una, Vanessa, Rochelle watcha doing saturday girl?” Obviously they were not doing enough.

But I want them to, quite honestly they’re the laughing stock of the pop scene. Every day I check their Facebook page religiously and read through those pesky “Come to Brazil” fan comments and watch their management post the same old “Buy This, Buy That, ReBuy it Again”. ENOUGH. Clearly they haven’t been making money and I’m not a business person but I count those singles and album numbers and divide the sales total by 10 (my personal guess including management, hair, makeup). Music is a business, everything in life revolves around money and sadly I don’t think they’re making any. Before I furtherly continue to beg for them to stop, I have studied music models and previous bands and know that most artists/groups sign a 3 or 5 album contract that includes a Greatest Hits. Now I am not a fool and when I received that mailer on a early Saturday morning (4:36am US EASTERN TIME YES GURL YES I STAY AWAKE) and read a Greatest Hits and Tour was on the way I smelled BURNT FISH n CHIPS!

Forever Is Over indeed. I hate to write this because The Saturdays lyrics and individual personalities have been there for me on lonely car rides and countless weekends when the DJ would tell me that “Faster" was not in his library. Their labels’ ability not to recognize their WORLD DOMINATION n talents back in 2010 with "Higher" or in 2011 with their release of my favourite simultaneous HIT summer hit singles "Notorious"/”All Fired Up"(released on Beyonces BDAY and ALWAYS a fan favourite) totally FUCKED THEM UP! Now maybe I don’t know the rules of putting a song on iTunes or Single Releases for each country and I apologize, but it hurts for them to release 18 singles and only to be found on UK/Ireland iTunes when their talents, or lack their of are hardly appreciated. THINK OF THE POOR BRAZILIANS!  

Being a true “Gentleman" I won’t continue to bash my girls anymore. But as I sit here writing this, and I could write for hours thinking about ways their label could have squeeze money out us since 2008. Expanding through Europe by doing festivals, working endless to get the brand known! I simply will say that I am disappointed at the biggest lie The Saturdays brand is throwing at us. I know they are OVER-BOOM-KAPOW Hello they have pretty much given us "30 Days" notice. Look at The Wanted, after a 3 album deal and they announced to be taking “a break to pursue further careers” BULLSHIT! Obviously they have to renegotiate another 3 or 5 album deal and want more money. No label wants to put money on hold, as they say in retail customer service above ALL and if the label had it their way those dirty boys would have a summer single playing on every radio right now. HELLO am I the only one thinks its all not al Puppets” and Disco Love”.Back to “Work” my saturdays please just tell us that “Finest Selection: The Greatest Hits" (very clever by the way I wonder if Sarah or Adam thought of it) will be a prequel to the goodbye album that is their #6 or #5 since they totally erased  their original sophomore album from existence (Remember I told you old management by Jayne Collins fucked them OVAH? yeah it was that bad). 

"Get Ready, Get Set" oh yes baby since no one will read this I will keep on going and tell you what Sparked this. SO I’m here literally playing the girls brand new single for the summer of 2014 celebrating 6 years called "What Are You Waiting For" and if you’ve read this whole thing, Im waiting for honesty. I decided to be a good fan and actually stream their video on repeat, rather than ripping a low quality version from it until the single comes out and I get true iTunes quality. Honestly my friend (and LOYAL Team Sats) Gustavo and I stayed up till 4AM to listen to the world premiere, At first, it was not that great and all I kept thinking about “how could they make us buy this garbage”. But tonight I nonetheless kept hitting command R (Refresh-if you run on windows but you need to honestly tell yourself its #NOTGOODENOUGH and upgrade) to see why its not my fav song that should be in my playing shower rituals! In-between I was reading hateful Lady Gaga comments, another lady who I blew off because everyone did. BUT SHE SAVED ME and so now I owe her and repent for only listening to ARTPOP once. 

Coming off my huge "Ego" I realized that people(ME) always get used to the same music n never want to break the mold and after seeing Gaga live,  IT MADE SENSE. ARTPOP is a renaissance of life and all that bullshit Katy Perry is singing about Birthdays and Roaring really doesn’t help anyone and neither did my negative nancy attitude. Readjusting my ‘Radar’ I went back to the "WhatAWF" video and looked at the comments and it was mostly positive. WHAT? WHEN? WHY? are these positive comments being posted and I realized I had to break the song down. 3 weeks later and with a clear approach realized I missed one if not the BIGGEST detail. IT WAS A XENOMANIA produced SONG.

HERStory Lesson Children: UK girl group ‘Girls Aloud' (who's offices The Saturdays excitedly took over when they split) recorded a song called "Biology". Now if you love all things Anglo you probably saw GAs farewell special but no one is reading so I will say it again. "Bio" is actually 4 songs *insert Death Drop* because that is the way XENOMANIA forever and cunningly will always work! On a label deadline and not wanting 4 songs to go to waste, what must the team do, Copy/Paste into History of the charts…..which landed them at #4 in the UK (there seems to be a 4 pattern going around).

Back to our regularly scheduled program and if you "Wish You Didnt Know" those are clearly "White Lies".

How CLEVER was WhatAWF” with its Chorus/Verse/Chorus/Bridge/Chorus and the way Xenomania just brilliantly probably made each of the girls sing the entire song…fooling them making the girls think ”we’ve done this before but we will wait till the final mix to hear Una’s classic Bridge into High Note”. BUT NOOOOOO the final mix gave them each pieces of the chorus/verse with less than 10 words each, granted lyrically "WhatAYWF" is about 3 sentences when combined properly. Not the stereotypical formula which is genius! It took me 3 weeks Team Sats but I cracked the XENOMANIA code and I am on board. I DONT CARE, I LOVE IT! 

There have been a few performances floating around of the girls performing "WhatAYWF" but I don’t bother with low quality fan vids. Tonight for the sake of counting words I had to watch, and while the girls are back to moving around stage instead of the usual “Point and Smile and don’t forget to plug the new single” I can’t help but notice that they stick to their rehearsals instead of branching out and spreading across the stage. But alas they complained when their "What About Us" routine was too complicated (HELLO Have they ever heard challenging yourself??? and Americans don’t like mimes).

I will forever be grateful to management Adam n Peter for allowing me to meet the girls back in New York City in 2013! and If you look closely I’m on their TV show (OMG YES I KNOW) but I don’t like lies and I honestly want to know the truth. Only time will tell and my prediction is album #5 (or #6) will come next fall of 2015 with 1 or 2 singles to complete a full cycle of 20 sophisticated pop gems released (ONLY IN THE UK, DESCULPE BRASIL) that will always be on my iPod. 

Thank You.

Finest Selection: The Greatest Hits" and "What Are You Waiting For" will be out on August 10 followed by a farewell "Greatest Hits Tour" in September of 2014.

ARTRAVE: ARTPOP BALL ATLANTIC CITY

ARTRAVE: ARTPOP BALL ATLANTIC CITY

For The Crazy Record - Writing Class from CarlosCrazySelf on Vimeo.

Cuckoo stories from behind the scenes of my life

hahahaaa

hahahaaa

(Source: captainbritish)

shitlemon:

The shade here is relentless

THE SHADE IS SERIOUS!

shitlemon:

The shade here is relentless

THE SHADE IS SERIOUS!

mmmgash:

Can we discuss just how many times The Saturdays have performed a man down?

Up: Frankie had appendicitis and missed performances.
The Work Tour: Vanessa fell down the stairs on night two of the tour and buggered her foot. Rochelle missed two songs due to illness.
Missing You: Mollie was bitten…

This is true

when you put someone in their place! #stepvoguecrossrepeat

when you put someone in their place! #stepvoguecrossrepeat

(Source: nokiabae)


Azealia Banks and JoJo.


When was this?  2008

Azealia Banks and JoJo.

When was this? 2008

(Source: azealiabanksweb)

HAHAAA

(Source: vinebox)